Tag Archives: crazy uncle ron

GOP

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As the Florida Primary is about to begin, I realize now how sick I am of Newt Gingrich. I mean, I’ve never really liked the guy but seriously, the stuff he says is actually mental institution admittance criteria. I really like watching the GOP debates because it’s just hilarious and awkward to see them fight one another. It’s also very predictable. That’s why I have established a drinking game —

WARNING: use with extreme caution, you could end up drinking yourself to death

Take a sip every time…

  1. The audience boos/cheers about something that normal people would not boo or cheer for.
  2. Mitt Romney’s taxes are mentioned.
  3. Newt Gingrich attacks the moderator.
  4. There is a reference to three different candidates winning three different states.
  5. Gingrich makes a reference to Ronald Reagan/him being a Ronald Reagan conservative.
  6. Good ol’ Uncle Paul has a confused look of bewilderment on his face -not to be confused with his confused look of not understanding a joke was being made.
  7. Rick Santorum makes a reference to him winning in a predominantly working class Pennsylvania democratic constituency.
  8. Romney mentions that he worked at Bain Capital.
  9. Santorum has the look of utter disgust and confusion on his face.
  10. Space colonies are mentioned.

Anyway, the other day I watched the GOP Florida debate, and pretty much all I gleaned from that was that…

  1. Ron Paul, bless his soul, is probably going to die soon so we shouldn’t elect him.
  2. Rick Santorum should just quit now and save himself money and the inevitable embarrassment of just existing past Florida.
  3. Mitt Romney needs to watch his own ads.
  4. Wolf Blitzer is a BAMF. (Especially compared to John King).
  5. Newsflash, Newt is still a d-bag and his wife is still creepy as hell.

What I really found interesting was that one of the questions asked was “why would your wife be the best first lady?” Okay, am I the only one who thinks that question is just awkward and kind of insulting? It’s like, really? Do we need to know that your Mars Attacks wife plays the French Horn? Should I care? NO. Many people play the French Horn. My own mother plays the French Horn (for serious). How does playing the French Horn make her stand out? How does it even portray her as a person? Are we supposed to like her just because she can play an instrument? Ugh.

I also watched MissRepresentation yesterday and found out that our country SUCKS when it comes to equal representation of men and women in the political process. GAH. I think we’re ranked 90th in the world in accordance to the amount of women in higher political office, which means that we’re behind obvious places like Sweden, and quite surprising places like Cuba. CUBA, PEOPLE. Yeah.

I think it is so unfortunate that women in politics, regardless of the candidate’s wife or the actual candidate, are judged on their outer appearance. And what is even more unfortunate is that women are lumped in two categories, they are either hot, MILFy, and stupid (Sarah Palin) or smart, shrewish, and asexual (Hillary Clinton). This even occurs in the news media with anchors, like those blondes on Fox compared to someone like Rachel Maddow (even though I think she’s prettier than them, and I have proof because I met her in real life when she was just walking down the street and she was dressed casually with no makeup and she was seriously just gorgeous).

It just seriously bothers me.

 

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