Tag Archives: movies

I wish I had Channing Tatum’s voice

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“YOU KNOW, I’VE BEEN FEELUN’ THIS WAY FOR A LUNG TIYME”

“I’M FEELUN’ SUMTHIN’ SO REEEAL RIGHT NAO”

“BABY GURL, YOU KNOW I’M FEELUN’ YOU”

“YE, YOU KNOW HOW I DOOO”

Channing Tatum. Yes, it’s another post involving everyone’s favorite quasi-ghetto white boy from Tampa. He has a really weird way of talking that makes me want to learn how to talk like him as well as it makes me want to have him narrate everything. I don’t even know how to explain how he talks, but it’s some kind of romantic ghetto white boy mixed with southern gentleman. IDK.

To sound like him, you kind of have to talk like you have a medium size jawbreaker in your mouth and have had a few sips of the wine sitting in that box in your fridge. Then just talk about stuff like love and sports and being with one girl for the rest of your life.

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The Vow, among other things

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As you may know, The Vow is coming out for Valentine’s Day this year -and no, it’s not a Nicholas Sparks book made into a movie. Apparently it’s “inspired by true events,” but that could mean that there was a girl who lost her memory and she was married. I don’t know.

Anyway, this film is about a girl (Rachel McAdams) who is married to a guy (Channing Tatum), and everything about their life together is all magical and butterflies, that is until they get into a car accident and she forgets that she even has a husband. So pretty much I’m going to assume that the rest of the film is him trying to win her back through romantic gestures (watch the trailer on YouTube).

Now, I have nothing against these kinds of movies, I mean, other than that they display sickeningly cute stories that are unattainable to us simple, real folk. For one, girls in real life usually don’t look like Rachel McAdams. Two, men in real life usually don’t look like Channing Tatum (or at least have the body he has). Three, both men and women aren’t ever as charming as they are in the movies; call me a cynic but I’d like to think of myself as a realistic kind of gal. I’m not saying that there aren’t some adorable couples out there that seem to be pretty close to the couple portrayed in The Vow, but believe me, I know a helluva lot more who are seriously dysfunctional compared to McAdams and Gosling -I mean, Tatum.

So… Romantic comedies. One time I took a film class in high school and one of the movie genres we looked at was the romantic comedy, and my teacher at the time told us that he had chosen the movies he did because he had an aversion to romantic comedies, or as he called them, chick flicks. I actually really liked this teacher and I thought he was hilarious, and don’t worry, he wasn’t some creepy bachelor against love -he was actually expecting a baby at the time, but he did express the feelings that so many men have towards romantic comedies, or as they like to call them, chick flicks.

But here’s the thing, not all romantic comedies are chick flicks, and not all chick flicks are romantic comedies. Um, Beaches anyone? That s*** was not funny, but it is definitely a movie that only women usually enjoy. Or take His Girl Friday, one of the movies my teacher picked for his romantic comedy genre -this movie isn’t a chick flick. Men enjoy it too. I think more classic movies like HGF are in the rom com category rather than the chick flick/rom com category.

The other rom com that my teacher chose was Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, which is one of my favorite movies. ESOTSM is a movie that is definitely a rom com and not a chick flick. It’s quirky and romantic without being overtly romantic, subtly romantic -sneaky romantic, maybe.

I think that’s the main difference -that rom coms are sneaky in the way that the fit romance into the plot, whereas chick flicks are all about the gooey, butterflies-in-the-stomach type of romance -they lay it all out for you. But here’s the real tricky thing, some movies qualify as the subtle and cerebral type of romance -rom coms- but at the same time, men would probably hate renting them, for whatever reason. Like Sliding Doors, I like that movie because it’s cute but not too cute. The plot isn’t just romance, it’s about a woman finding herself. But at the same time, there is a good deal of romance and relationship talk, not to mention the fact that  men would probably not enjoy it much either. I don’t know why, but whenever there’s a charming man with an accent, guys don’t seem to like it. I think they find it threatening.

Anyway, as much as we all claim to dislike rom coms and how they stretch reality, isn’t that why we go to the movies? To escape from reality?

oscar snubs, and why the oscars don’t really matter

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One thing that I have grown accustom to is watching those Oscar bait movies that always end up occurring at the end of the year -so they’re able to qualify for the upcoming Oscars whilst still being fresh in Academy voters’ minds.

Now, of course, the Oscars have always been a source of debate over who should be nominated, which spills over to the who should have been nominated and who should not have been nominated categories. This year, for whatever reason, it seems like many people who deserved to be nominated didn’t get nominated.

Personally, the Oscars are, and have been, extremely political. Voters also like to give the awards to people who have “earned” it over their career -see Kate Winslet, Nicole Kidman, no doubt Leonardo DiCaprio in about five years. To me, this is bull s***. Can’t you give them a freaking lifetime achievement Oscar? Yes, the merit isn’t exactly the same, but it doesn’t make sense to give what is essentially a pity award to someone undeserving for their current work over someone who truly deserved the award. Unfortunately, the Oscar voters are crotchety old men who are probably more senile than critical.

Anyway, in my opinion, one of the most deserving actors was left off of the list this year -Shailene Woodley for her role in The Descendants. I think she carried the film more so than George Clooney, who was nominated for best actor. Maybe voters couldn’t get over the fact that she’s on The Secret Life of the American Teenager, or maybe they thought hey! She’s young, she’s still got time. Whatever the reason, I think it’s a shame and a most definite snub to Woodley. I think it is also safe to say that the Academy gave Woodley’s spot to Jessica Chastain in The Help, which, while her performance was good, was more worthy of a Golden Globe nom. It was cute, campy, and Chastain pulled it off, but it wasn’t really a hard role to handle in the first place.

Even though the Oscars are seen as the “be all, end all” of the movie world, I really think they’re becoming more and more irrelevant, which is a good thing. Not as many people watch the Oscars, and as a young adult, I can tell you that the strong majority of my friends could not care any less about what movie wins or who gets nominated.

We need to stop glorifying the Oscars for what we perceive them to be. Sure, acting can be tough, but the awards we should really care about are the Nobel Prize and the Pulitzer, among others. Personally, I think it’s a good thing that we’re moving away from the prestige of awards, even though it’s also scary to think that entertainment is becoming just variations of Keeping up with the Kardashians and Jersey Shore. I’m hopeful but I’m not stupid.